Who Would Have Thought?

One of very few online quizzes I take.

You scored as Phantom. You belong to the Phantom Regiment! You love classical music, and Shostakovich is the man! 1996 was a great year in drum corps, because Phantom WON! Phantom 100% Star of Indiana 83% Madison Scouts 67% Cadets 58% Senior Corps 50% Spirit 42% Santa Clara Vanguard 33% Spartans 33% Blue Devils 33% Cavaliers 25% What Drum & Bugle Corps are you? created with QuizFarm.com

You can't go wrong with that! SUTA Kids...see you at SOS

The Block is Back!

It's the end of guard season and you know what that means...a shopping trip to IKEA! IKEA has nothing to do with winter guard unless the show is in California. So off to California I go for the WGASC Championships. My guard is competing in a small class, so they should do ok.

Besides Championships and IKEA, I get to hang out with my friend Tony. He's a cool dude. I only get to see him a few times a year. Sad for friends who only live 4 hours apart. We have a great time together so this trip won't be any different.

Oh and I get to introduce my guard to the gock block. I've never needed it before but I'll need it now. So we'll see how well they react to it. Just ask UEX how much they love the block ;)

Have a great weekend everyone!

Tan Fat is Better than White Fat

No one has told all the whities that have come out from under a rock. This past weekend was beautiful here in Vegas. Seriously, if it could stay like this, I'd love this place. But for now I'll just enjoy it as long as possible.

White legs everywhere. I'm guilty too, but I only wear shorts at home and not out in public because I know my legs are whiter than snow. But I'm working on that. Got me some Target brand daily gradual self-tanner. It's pretty gradual...haven't noticed anything yet. But when I do, shorts will be my daily weekend wear.

But everyone else, please keep the shorts on (unless you're a red-head and naturally white) until you darken those saddle bags.

Top Burger

Justin and I like to judge certain things. This habit may have come from marching corps or guard.
"Oh they'll so beat Cavaliers!"
"No way, Blue Devils is no where near first place with that show!"
"Ok this is my order..."

We do this with everything. He'll ask me if I had to choose from 3 taco places for beaners which would it be. And I can't just give him an answer, he wants to know why I picked that one. (The answer was Taco Bell, because they are consistent and cheap.)

Ok looking back it does mostly revolve around food. But sometimes (well every year) we do Drum Corps shows, Winter Guard shows, cars or anything else that interests us.

One of our favorite rankings is hamburgers. Vegas has many different places to get a good hamburger. So we've made our very own top 5 list. This list is mine.

Coming in at 5th place is...Wendy's. I don't know if it's the squareness or what, but if you get it without pickles, it's great!

In 4th place, I really don't have one. But if I did it would go here until I'd re-evaluate the burger rankings.

3rd place is Fudruckers. Unfortunately we don't have one here so when I do get one, I savor it. So big...so good.

2nd place was tough because I'm pretty picky about where I get my hamburgers. And ranking them is tough (and I explained that to Justin). But In and Out is my number 2. If you've never had one and you plan a trip out west, make sure you try one. They make it right when you order it (beware of long lines) and you can get it without salt or anything on the patty. It's a pretty tasty burger on it's own.

Which brings me to my number 1 choice. A good burger with yummy toppings goes to my new love, Red Robin's Blue Ribbon Burger. I don't want to gross anyone out, but it's mainly blue cheese with onion strings and a spicy chipolte sauce. Oh it's so good. And because I love it so much I have to limit myself with it severely! Just like Fudruckers, I savor it when I do have one. The zesty, tangyness of the blue cheese and the sauce is a perfect combination on a burger. Justin won't try it because of the blue cheese. Nor will I try his favorite at Red Robin, the Royal (a fried egg...gross!).

I'm sure my rankings will change if and when I find another great burger. But until then, I'll keep this order. But now my new favorite food is the Bocca chicken patties! And there is only one kind so that's my number 1 chicken sandwich. Watch out Bocca, Red Robin might over-throw you.

Amazing Little Bands

Finally, after 9 months of being in side rubber bands (one side only) and after 3 months of the front-to-bottom rubber bands, my bite is officially changing!

It's in a transition where it doesn't know where to bite. Like it's saying, "What the heck am I doing in this spot! I go over there." Not anymore my friend.

I have a cross bite on one side and a mid-line that is way off. So rubber bands have been part of my life for over 9 months. And I'm sick of them. But now I see that they are actually working.

At this rate I should get them off when I'm 33! Not too bad eh?

Don't Make Me Cringe

As some of you may know, I'm not the worlds best speller. I know, it's a shock. However, I feel like such a slacker when I use the spell checker tool. It makes it so easy to never even know you made a mistake. For example: I could spell a word such as "their," but I might not be using it correctly. Spell check doesn't pick it up, I have to. Since I don't really like to use spell check, I try not to misspell words.

I don't think that other people are conscious of what they are spelling. Recently, Writinggal got all pissy over "y'all," today I'm getting pissy over the word "a lot." Friends! You're killing me with this word! I have told myself many times to just get over it and deal with it. But when people with advance education are spelling it wrong "alot," I cringe. CRINGE!

Seriously, if you are not going to use spell checker and spell words like "Vacuum" and "Conscious" correctly (and good for you if you can) but not spell "a lot" correctly, then you deserve to hear my rant. It is 2 separate words, DO NOT write it as one!

"You look like you've lost a lot of weight."
It's not:
"You look like you've lost alot of weight."

I will stop reading whatever I'm reading if I see that word spelled wrong. So a warning to you; you might lose me if you can't spell:

a lot
a lot
a lot
a lot

New Photos

Ok Tony, because of your "request" I've changed my photo. I thought I'd throw Justin into it too. I know he doesn't even read my blog unless I force him to or when Mike challenges him.

Let me know what you think and don't hold back like you did yesterday. I think we are cute but that's me.

Have a good day everyone!

Short Problems

My height is important to me. If you seen me you know why. I am 5 feet tall. Unfortunately no more than that. However, when I went to the Doctor's office the other day, the nurse measured me and said "4 feet 11 inches." "No I'm 5 feet tall, don't put down 4'11." She then reassured me that she doesn't think the scale is accurate.

What kind of Doctor's office is this where they are using inaccurate tools? If that's the case, I can only hope that the scale was off in my favor.

So going into the examining room with the knowledge of me an inch shorter, I was also told that my left leg was longer than the right. Not by much but just enough to cause the pain that I was having. What the hell kinda twilight zone was I in? Being short has always been a problem for me and now I'm a gimp.

But then we both came to the conclusion that training for the marathon did it to me. Grrr Marathon! I knew you were no good to me!

She gave me the suggestion of seeing a chiropractor to get re-aligned. I'll do anything if it will give me back my inch...oh and take away the pain.

I went to the chiropractor. I'm not sure about the whole thing. I did like the popping sounds that came from my neck, back and hips. But I'm not sure that it gave me back my lost inch. I go again on Wednesday. I'll make sure to ask her if she can make me taller. Or at least make my legs even.

NASCAR Crap

NASCAR was in town this weekend with all their beer and ugly jackets. I have no problem with the "sport" but I do have a problem with what their fans represent.

I know what the confederate flag looks like. I know what it means. Then why it is still flown along side the American Flag?

At a NASCAR event?

And this is why that "sport" will never get my attention. Well no more than this.

Sunday's Aren't Safe Anymore!

Cable t.v. has always been a luxury. When Justin and I were first married, we learned to love Fox and UPN. So we never really missed cable t.v. And if there was something that we wanted to see, we'd head over to my grannies house. She's got all the time in the world so she has to have cable. Has to!

We also used other free resources, like the library, to get caught up on our favorite series. One of these being The Sopranos. We'd heard it was fabulous and evil. We had to see it. And even though we were years behind (the show first aired in 1999 and we started watching it in 2003) we never had to wait for a new episode. So we'd check out each season and watch them with excitement. We knew the opening song, "Woke Up This Morning" by the 3rd episode and we loved Tony and Carmela. Well I just loved her house, not her accent. But it became a favorite show that we both loved to discuss and theorize.

Last year, after we breezed through the newly released season 5, we knew it would be at least 2 years before we saw season 6. It was something we just had to live with. So to hold me over, Justin got me The Sopranos Trivia game. We've only played it once and I think I got all the questions wrong, but I still tried and learned. It was like a new episode but trivia style!

But the wait is over my friends for both Season 6 and digital cable t.v.! Knowing that the first episode of season 6 starts this Sunday and knowing a friend over at Cox Cable, the timing couldn't be more perfect. I called up my friend Poodle and he got us a great 3 month deal for only $7.95. I only need 3 months because that's how long The Sopranos will be on. After that, we will go back to our basic cable. Justin says he'll need that in writing, but I don't want to pay the extra money. So Justin, (in writing) I will call Poodle and cancel HBO in 3 months; June 9th. And we will just be happy with my encore channels.

Blog readers, you are my witness!

And the Winner is...

I thought some of my readers would like see what all the hype was about with BrokeBack Mountain. I haven't seen that movie yet, but I think that this one looks better!

What a Surprise!

Justin actually decided to post a comment on my blog! If you missed it, just look in the comments from the post below this one. Of course when he has to defend himself against Mike, he'll do whatever it takes.

He looks happy to have posted here!

Confessions

A simple question for my blog readers: What is your guilty movie pleasure? For example, I have a few that I normally would be embarassed to say. But I recently told some and a few agreed with me. So I'm going to share them and you are welcome to share your guilty movie pleasures too.

Now before I do I need state a few rules so no one gets hurt.

1-You can laugh but you can't be rude. "that's funny, but you've got to be an idiot to like that movie." Don't be rude friends.

That's my rule. Ok onto sharing!

My guilty movie pleasures are:

Blast from the Past-"He's a baby man"
Strange Brew-"Hey you got a credit card? Geez travel eh?"
Home Alone-It's comforting and makes me go to sleep.

And anything MST3K The best of the worst movies made funny. Good times.

So what's yours?

Winter Blue's...Grey's and Purple's!

Color this season isn't just brown's and grey's. Well depending on what winter guard you see. If you're asking what winter guard is, don't worry my friends, I'll tell you. Winter guard is associated with the color guard you see marching with the band during half-time. What makes them different is the season. Once football season, or marching season is over, the flag line moves indoors for more of an intimate perfomace.

I've been involved in this for years. So many that I teach now. I create the shows, design the costumes, flags and equpiment work. It's a lot of work, I don't recommend you do it. Unless you have staff to help. And this year I do.

We each have a responsibility. One guy designs the show and costumes. One girl cleans and writes flag work. Another girl cleans and writes the movement and sabres. And I only have to clean and write the rifle work. Why didn't I do this with all my other guards? What was I thinking? Dealing with 12 crazed kids all by myself is not as glamerous as others in the activity think it may be.

The season has started and it's an exciting time. Some guards from my past are doing great and others aren't. Show concepts are all original in their own sense. Basically everything has been done. Some group just might alter it a bit to make it their own. Or flat out copy a past show and lie about it. That's a good way to get your guard noticed.

But we all have our favorites one way or another. Some are based on show concepts, colors, uniforms, difficulty of equpiment work, etc. What usually sticks in my head are colors. In normal culture (non winter guard world) you don't pair black and blue...right? Apparently it's ok in the winter guard world. The more outrageous the color combination the (apparently) more 'creative' the designer is. Just because your girls are wearing blue and pink doesn't mean your show has depth. It means they look stupid. Especially spinning orange and white flags. But since these colors are so outrageous, I'd probably remember the show.

Last season I atteneded the regional over in So. Cal. I saw a lot of guards. Some really great, some really bad and many in the middle. I remember the really good one and the really bad ones. But Woodbridge was one of my favorite in the Scholatsic A class. And they did really well at WGI (Winter Guard International). They created a musical montage of all Alfred Hitchcock's movies. And when I saw it for the first time over at the SoCal regional the sabre entrance with the music from Psycho was so thrilling, I got goosebumps. They did eventually change it to this final product. But it was still my favorite part of the whole show. I hope you enjoy it too.

If you look at their uniforms, it's the outline of A.H. face! Great GE!

The Air Drill is for Professionals

The easiest way to update your living room is to change up your curtains. That's why I told my Target pharmacist when I was buying my new curtains. "Hanging up curtains?" "Yep!"

I don't just chat it up with my Pharmacist at Target, I was actually picking up a prescription. Since I had a small basket of items, I decided to check out there. But the Target Pharmacists are nice enough to talk to. Unlike the *Marathon-hater.

Having a Saturday project is fun especially when it's easy like hanging curtain rods and curtains. I was excited. I got home and showed Justin my curtains. He thought they were cool. We have rich, dark red walls in our living room and I got a stainless steel rod with deep red velvet curtains and 2 tie back rods. I know that might be too much red, but I knew it would look good against our black couch. Plus they were on sale too, so I really couldn't pass it up.

So using the air drill, which was a pain in the ass, I marked and drilled holes according to their directions. However when I put my little grey plugs (to hole the screws in place) the holes I just drilled were too big! A little annoyed that I just drilled into my dark red walls and dust flying everywhere, I did what any girl would do. Asked for help from my husband.

"Juuu-stin! I think I've ruined our walls! This was only supposed to take me 15 minutes tops and it's not."

"Hmm, I think we need spackle."

Off to Home Depot for some spackle. That store is only fun when you have projects, but when you don't it's the last place you really want to wander around. We got our spackle and a new set of bits for the air drill and went home. Justin spackled the holes and decided to put the grey thingys in the wall while it was drying. I would have never thought of that. And I'm the toolbelt diva in my house!

We let it dry for a few hours just to be sure. And guess what, it took me 10 minutes to hang those curtains! I love the new look. Our living doesn't look like every apartment we've lived in with just white blinds. This is our house and now we have the curtains to prove it.


*Marathon-hater: Some you come across on the street, either walking to work or walking home from work, complaining to you how they closed the roads down and whinning about how they can't get to work or home. This person might look familiar to you but you can't put your finger on it because you are running a marathon. Then come to find out this person is the rude woman who checks you out over at your local Target.

Hot Tip #4: Cleaning Products

Over the past few years, the whole cleaning process has been redefined to make it easier and somewhat enjoyable. With products like "Swiffer" and the "Clorax Ready Mop," taking care of the floors is simple, easy and not an all day process. Newly designed sponges and wipes make cleaning the counters a snap. And they are disinfected at the same time. Toilet brushes have changed too, but I don't want to talk about those. That's personal.

Commercials have gone from a satisfied house mom with a huge smile on her face when her floors are clean or when her counters are germ free. To womem and (shockingly) men having fun cleaning with things like the swiffer duster. I never thought cleaning was fun. I hated doing it, but I wanted that satisfied smile on my face. Sadly, I'd settle for a half smile. "Ehh, it's good enough."

However, I have found 2 products that made me smile bigger than any of those moms on tv.

First off my stove top. We have all gas appliances including the stove. I really love it, but I hate how dirty it gets. Sometimes the stove gets so hot that it bakes whatever spilled to a crispy lump. At that point, it becomes extremely difficult to remove. But Mr. Clean came to my rescue (as he does in his commercials) with his magic eraser. This thing rocks my socks off. It's like a sponge and all you do is get it wet, squeeze and scrub. But amazingly you don't have to scrub hard. It's like you are wiping up something you just spilled. Something that's not baked on. It really is magic.

I take a lot of baths. So the ring around the bathtub is frequent. I hate scrubbing it. It has to be the hardest thing to clean. Reaching over with a scrub brush and in the most difficult position, try to clean your bathtub. It's not possible. I actually considered getting the Mr. Clean bathroom thingy. It's like a swiffer, but for bathtubs, sinks, floors and the shower wall. I didn't and I'm glad I didn't.

Instead I bought some Bathroom & Kitchen CLR spray. I actually bought it for my toilets (we have hard water here, it's annoying). Worked great for that so I read some more about it. "Good for soapscum" Sweet. I started to spray it in one spot in the tub. This time I used a sponge instead of a brush. Holy Cow...it was like wiping up dirt. CLR made it so easy! I was amazed! I think I cleaned the bathtub twice last night because it was so much fun! It didn't need it the second time, I just want to see it sparkle and it did.

So I ended the night with a huge smile, knowing that I've conquered 2 of the most annoying problems in cleaning. And so effortlessly. Now if only getting Justin to put his clothes in the basket could be effortlessly, I'd be set.

Olympic Memories

The Winter Games are in full swing and it just reminds me of when I was in the Winter Games of Salt Lake City in 2002. Yes, yes my friends, I was part of the Olympics in 2002. I experienced thrills, excitement and disappointment that all the athletes felt during my Olympic times. It was as they say, a once-in-a-life-time experience.

When I interviewed for the internship I didn't know what I was getting into. I just wanted to get it so I could say "I can't, I have to go to the Olympics tomorrow." How jealous would people be? Well they were jealous once they saw my cool jacket! With "Host Broadcaster" across the back, I was part of the crowed. The people who brought you the skating scandals and record breaking events...not NBC. They bought the rights from us (just a little known fact). NBC butchered it as they do every year, but that's a different blog.

My first shock was when they told us that we would have to sit in this room (in the International Broadcast Center (IBC)) for 12 hours a day and just wait for an assignment. 12 hours? Yep.

Our first assignment was to work over at the uniform distribution center. Workers would come in and get fitted for they type of clothing they would need at their event. That was fun for the first 2 days and I had about 2 weeks of that. Then after the first 2 days, we were told we get one day off that week and that would be it...til the end of the Olympics. This was only January.

Holy Cow! I know the Olympics is this huge event, but when am I supposed to go grocery shopping? See my husband? Sleep? I realized that I was in for an "Olympic" job.

I actually hated the job I was given. It wasn't challenging or difficult but the other interns I worked with were doe heads. And when the driving crew came in looking for another driver, I jumped at the chance. And I got it. My new intern job was to sit in an even smaller room, a trailer basically that smelled like boy, and wait for a driving assignment. Sounds the same, but this time I got to go to all the venues.

This was a killer job to have as an intern. Since I was stationed at the IBC, I had an all access pass to everything. So I took advatage. I'd walk through all the Countries broadcast stations and check them out. I would get to drive up to where all the athletes were at the events. And if you asked ahead of time (and if the driving schedule wasn't busy) I could eat lunch at the venue (with all the other broadcasters and camera guys. And I could see the event from a non-spectator location. Couldn't ask for a better perk.

Another perk was most of the events were up in Park City, where my husband worked at the time. So after I would drop off my team, I'd have breakfast or lunch with him.

I saw the Canadian and Russian Pairs coming out of a press conference after the scandal at the IBC. I also saw a bunch of other medal winners leaving their press conferences. I got a massage a bunch of times, got a manicure, slept, ate lunch, watched the BNL on closed circuit t.v. (since I didn't have tickets) all at the IBC. And amazingly, no money was exchanged (except for food). Trades were made for everything else. It was the IBC Olympic way! Candy bars or lapel pins it...if we had it, we traded it.

My Olympic day's ended one week after the final medals were handed out. Tear down started immediately and my driving job was done. In that time, I had driven all over the valley and been to place I didn't even know existed. I'd gone through security about 15 times a day. I fianlly got to sleep in later than 5am. I also got a huge paycheck (I know I said this was an internship, but all the interns got paid. BONUS!) My cool jacket is still in the closet with all my Olympic memorabilia.

My medal is my identification pass. I looked cute and it said "All Access". It proves that I successfully completed my Olympic task. And with the memories I made, I'd say I won gold. Or lot's of green!

Welcome to My Cubicle

Re-post

I've had two jobs since graduating. Not too bad for finally graduating in December of 2003 (it took me some time, give me a break!). My first job was a video designer. I had an office with crazy blue walls and fun posters courtesy of my boss. It was creative heaven...somewhat. When I wanted to rock out to Barenaked Ladies, I could just shut my door and turn it up. I wasn't the only one rocking out. Sometimes all four edit bay's would have their doors shut with music blasting through the seams. One Dave Mathews, Barenaked Ladies, Ghetto-Booty and Techno.

My office was my place to go when people frustrated me. My office was a semi 'home away from home' even though I really didn't want to be there.

Office...I miss you! My new job put me in a boring brown cube...next to other people...who talk loudly on the phone...who try to talk softly when they are talking about someone...who are annoying. But I was told that I was annoying! How can this be? I've only been here 6 weeks. It can't be this soon. I guess it's a new record for me.

I listen to music. I'm a creative person. I have to have it. But I also don't like to cause uncomfortable drama. Working with other Women, it was just a matter of time before it got uncomfortable.

One person talks on the phone really loud. So instead of creating tension and making her hate me, I got noise canceling headphones. They work, problem solved. I get to listen to my music, not her and no one got hurt. That's just the way she is on the phone, there's no changing that.

However now that I use my headphones, I hum. Apparently that really annoyed some cube-friends for a while. I say friends because the ones it annoyed like me now and so it doesn't bother them as much anymore. I've grown on them. I've been friendly, helpful and useful to them. However, one person still doesn't like me and still doesn't like my humming. I found this out when she ICQ'd me:

"could you keep the humming down?"
"ya, np. sorry"

I thought about this for a second and then got angry. My humming isn't as loud as my friends talking on the phone. It's not like her roommate who sat across from me belting out phrases of a song and yet no one says anything to her. I don't complain when she turns her space heater (which by the way, no one is supposed to have) and it creeps over to my side. I don't complain. I deal. I put my headphones on and tune it out.

Tension has been created. And until she moves, it will be there. I will continue to hum when I want but I will be more conscience of it and the next time she complains, I'll suggest she buy some noise canceling headphones. I'll even tell her how well they work.

"You'll never hear me hum again! Girlie!"

Post Removal

Dear Friends,

Some of you may have noticed that I removed yesterday's post. With the state of affairs here at work, I've decided to save it in my drafts and I'll re-post it in the future. Basically I'm chicken shit and I don't want to get in trouble or possible worse, loose my job. I don't think I said anything negative or hurtful. But some of you know who this is (by the art of deduction) and I don't want it getting around that I'm a trouble maker.

From one drama queen to another, she should be glad that I did this.

Don't worry, I will re-post it with no additions or anything taken away from it. Now's just not the time for it.

Thanks friends for understanding. And for those who did get to read it...let me know what you think about it and me pulling it.

Thanks!
JF

Trip Tik Itin

Trip Tik Itin. This is my new phrase. It's fun to say and it makes me feel organized. I'm not as bad as Clark W. Griswald but I have my trips planned and organized.

First trip is actually this weekend to California. Since I'm visiting 3 different schools for winter guard shows, I needed three different maps from mapquest. I could have done them in color, but decided against it. Each one is in the folder under different tabs. In order of where I'm going. Then I have the hotel confirmation and show schedules for all the shows I'm attending. This is all bound in a nice, neat folder with a cover page that says "WGI", just incase I forgot what I would be doing this weekend. It happens.

It may sound geeky and a little obsessive but it makes for a much safer and enjoyable trip. Try it sometime. You don't have to go overboard on the trip tik itin, but if you keep all of your trip information in one location, you'll know where you are going. And that's important when you go on a trip...with a trip tik itin.

Visit your local Office Depot. They have a great varitey of tabbed folders for your very own trip tik itin. Jazz it up with pictures throughout your tip tik itin or fun facts about the places you are going. Make your trip tik itin fun!

Or you can just go on your trip without one. To that I say "Good Luck!" You might not think you need one, but you'll come crawling back. Well you might have gotten lost because you didn't have a trip tik itin to help you back. Now you're really on your own. Good Luck!

The Takeover

With my new job, I have new people to talk to. Most of them already know me because they know Justin. But since I work here now, they are learning more and more about me. Including my obession with bean burrito's. I really hate to bring it up again, but last week was a highlight of my obsession.

On Monday I wanted lunch but wasn't sure of where to go. Justin and some of his friends were going to Rubio's. Sounded good. I got a bean burrito that, by the way, is comparable to my man's place, Roberto's. It was that good.

By Wednesday, I was craving it again. I asked Justin if he would go out with me and he said 'No'. So I asked a friend, she said, "I brought my lunch. Where do you want to go?" "RUBIO'S!" I explained to her how fantastic their bean burrito's were. She just laughed, as did everyone else around her. So she told Justin how much I wanted one for lunch. So he took me. And it was just as good as it was on Monday.

Thursday, I brought a bean burrito for lunch. It was everything I wanted it to be.

Friday...no beaners.

Saturday...no beaners. I was beginning to think my obsession had subsided for the week. Until Sunday. I really tried but the powerful craving overwhelmed me. I had two (yes you read that right) small kid sized beaners. I count it as two but really it was one. And man they were good.

Yes I know 5 times a week was obsessive, but I hadn't had one in a few weeks, so I was due. And when my new co-workers found out about this (because they ask now) they really saw that I was crazy. Well I'm glad I can entertain them the way I do. "How many this week?" One day they might start taking bets...I better get a cut of it. Since I'm the one eating all these beaners.

If I can keep it under 1 a week, I'm good. Don't worry my friends, last week was a freak of nature. I remember something in nutrition classe that we should all use: Moderation is key. Don't eat 5 beaners in a week.

Hot Tip #3: Music Storage

We are in the digital age...incase anyone forgot. This means you have to take the necessary precautions in order to safe guard your most important stuff on your PC: your mp3 files. Nowadays, people are buying cd's and importing them to their computer. This is great because you have the cd as a hard copy. Unless you sold them on ebay to pay for your latte or coach purse obsession. But if you fought the urge to sell them (and good for you!) then you won't have any problems if and when (because you know one day you'll see the blue screen of death and it'll all be over) it dies.

However. For those of you who are "purchasing" mp3's online(and I'm talking to you free-loaders too), then you should be aware of the trouble that you just might face when the blue screen of death faces you.

Besides backing up your important documents and personal stuff, your mp3's probably take up a good portion of your disk space right? I've got...well I'm not telling you how much I have, that's personal. But if you've got a lot of music and you have no hard copies, make hard copies.

MP3 files don't take up a lot of space on cd disks. Actually let's say if you have entire albums on your computer, you can copy that whole album folder onto your disk and still have room for your entire collection of Michael Bolton and Styx! So you can have like 15 albums on one cd, it's amazing!

Once this process is done and you've filled up the cd with all your mp3's, it's necessary to label the cd. This may sound stupid and silly but when you really want to listen to the greatest hits of Fleetwood Mac, you'll know where to find it. So take the time to label them.

The blue screen of death hits us all at one point...some more than others (thanks again for fixing it Justin!). But if you take the necessary steps, restoring won't be as painful as seeing blue...or loosing Michael Bolton.

Sorry Readers

My mad HTML skills didn't work. And how did that end up on here anyway? Honestly, I never posted it. Plus Tony, you already bought your love flowers.

I guess I'll just keep practicing.

Howard 100%

I'm sure I've mentioned a few time that I have satellite radio. I've had it for over a year. The programming is so much better than Las Vegas radio (sorry Aubry) that I never listen to it. Blah! The big news last year was Howard Stern would be heading over to Sirius. I thought to myself, "Ok, so what. I don't listen to regular radio anyway so it'll just be another show on satellite."

There is a problem with satellite radio; you don't stay on a channel for too long. Once the song or show is over, you change it to something else because you know something better is on. All of the channels are better so it's really hard to stick and listen. At least that's my problem.

The first day of Howard 100-101, Justin wanted to take my car to work. Every time he gets in the car, he instantly changes the channel to his favorites. But this day was different. He plugged in channel 100. I bitched, "I don't want to listen to this crap!!" "Come on, it's the first day! Let's just listen for a little bit. If it gets stupid we can change it." "Fine."

We listened to the show the whole way to work. It seems to have worn on me. And if you've never listened to Howard when he was before satellite, let me tell you why you should listen.

A) Only listen to him when you are awake. If you listen when you are waking up, the deepness of his voice will annoy the hell out of you (I would always yell to turn it off. That's probably why I hated the show so much).

B) This show is really for adults only. In case you didn't know. Seriously, most topics are covered and in great details. So if you are like his Intern who's never been with a chick, listening to the show would probably give you ideas that you might not otherwise have.

C) Sometimes the questions are dumb. However, it puts the questionee in an uncomfortable position (or comfortable) and then the real entertainment begins.

D) He has outrageous standby's. Midgets and drunks that are always willing to do whatever it takes to make me (the listener) laugh. Also making it possible to come back on the show. Hey if a midget thinks it's funny....then it must be ok to laugh.

E) Surprisingly you might learn something on his show. Recently, they all revealed something that no one else knew. Ya I really don't want to know who cheated on his wife or who had plastic surgery or who was...um... really bad. But when you listened to which each one belonged too, I was surprised and disgusted all at the same time. But I still listened. Just like millions of other listeners. Yes, he has millions of people listening to him, so he must be doing something right.

I've never been able to hear the entire show but I get enough of it on the way to work. But my channel flipping days are over on satellite radio. Unless he's talking about the FCC... boring! Let's see what's on the 80's channel. "Yes! Billy Joel!" Well maybe I still flip...remember, there's always something better on!

January 24-25

While Writinggal was enjoying her birthday, I was celebrating too. Her's and mine. Actually I'm so busy today that I can't celebrate like I wanted too tonight. Sad I know. But don't fret, I'm still going to honor today as my day, but I got to open everything up last night! It rocked!

Justin took me out to Lawrey's Steakhouse. The same people who make the great season salt have a great restaurant off the strip here. Without going into too much details, it was the best Prime Rib I've ever had. The house salad dressing was excellent and the Yorkshire Pudding (aka popover bread) was so tasty! While eating, I made a comment to Justin "How come there are tables full of men in here?" It was like a gentleman's club without all the hookers! It was very 40's style classy and upscale. So it was more like a country club. If you come into town, consider going there. It was well worth it!

We got home and I was 'allowed' to open my gifts from Justin. He's so paranoid sometimes. He was worried about one of the gifts...that I might not really like it. "You know me, you should know what I like!" And after opening the iffy one first, a sigh of relief came over him when I was all girlie and giggly. He got me a boombox for my satellite radio unit. Now I can listen to it anywhere in the house! Or take it camping...if we actually go sometime. Either way, I love it!

My second gift is just as cool and practical. Since I've started working, I'm suck in a rat maze of cubicles. I sit next to co-workers that chat on the phone all day (it's their job). So I'm always needing some headphones. Justin got me some noise canceling headphones. So I'm trying them out today. I'm 100% sure they will solve all my problems....of noisy people.

My third gift was something that I picked out after Christmas. He's been holding onto it since. So it was no big surprise when I opened it.

So today, I'm secretly celebrating my actual birthday with a bagel and a latte; my noise canceling headphones listening to satellite radio. This is how people should be celebrating their birthday's. Using the gifts they got the night before. Maybe next year my birthday will fall on a Friday. Then I can celebrate all weekend!

2nd Grade Idols

I attended most of my school years in Texas. Except kindergarten in Arizona and 2nd grade in Utah. I remember Kindergarten mostly because the school looked like a sombrero. The only thing missing was the chips and salsa.

My education there was standard I guess. You know the usual; learning Spanish, wishing I was in the other Kindergarten class (they had a 2-story play place!), learning about the fire alarm (a fellow classmate pulled the big red handle...stupid kid!) and bugging my brother who was in the classroom across from mine. His teacher eventually moved him. He was distracting me from learning Spanish!

But I really can't compare it to anything else. By the time I was in second grade, I had already moved from Arizona, Texas and was living in Utah. That one year in Utah would help me understand that I was always going to be surrounded by doe heads. I just became more aware of it at that age, state and school.

Apparently kids didn't like me. Well one boy specifically. During reading, I stood up to go to my desk and get my book. When I came back, this doe headed boy pulled the chair out from under me. Can you believe it? I fell hard and hit my head on a desk! My teacher picked me up and took me over to her desk carrying me like a baby. I was torn between being embarrassed at how she reacted and how much I cried. But either way, that boy is probably married with 9 kids. That's what you get for teasing me.

Another kid was always sick. This kid missed like half the school year. We didn't miss him because he always smelled like vomit. Nobody wanted to sit next to his desk because it smelled so bad. Vomit boy! His mom was also our class mom. She didn't smell like vomit though...he did.

Another classmate was kinda pathetic. She came to school with a hair brush stuck in her hair. She couldn't get it out and her mom couldn't get it out, but she sent her to school anyway. The rest of her hair was all messy. Like she had just started brushing and then it happened. I can just imagine that conversation. "Ouch! Mom, I can't get it out!" "Sorry, no time, you'll miss your bus." "But I can't go to school like this (crying)!" "It's your own fault if you ain't known how to brush your hair by now!"

Our teacher tried to take it out. No luck. Every girl tried to help her including me. I just tugged on it til her head couldn't take it anymore, but that brush was so tangled up in her hair, she'd have to cut it out. She spent the rest of the day with a brush in her hair. Somehow her mom got it out for the next school day. I didn't ask how. I felt bad for pulling on it so hard.

See, 2nd grade was when I became aware of myself around others. I thought, "I don't want to be like these idiots" and I'm not like them. I've never pulled a chair out from underneath anyone. I've uh, NEVER smelled like vomit.... never ever. I don't think I've even thrown up especially not from drinking. And I've never had a hair brush stuck in my hair. I've had ugly hair cuts, but that's not the same as a hair brush. But I've learned my lesson. I wonder if that girl went into beauty school. Maybe by then she'd learn how to brush her own hair. On second thought, let's hope she's not. I'd like to see an adult walking around with a brush stuck in her hair. I'd pull a chair out from someone to see that!

Hot Tip #2: Organizing

Do you come home to a house that bombards you with clutter? Do you have so much stuff that you don't know what to do with it all? Do you still have things in boxes from your move 18 years ago? If yes to any of these questions, I can help. What you need my friend is a little organization and good session of de-cluttering.

The first rule of getting your crap together or thrown out is: do you use it now? If you haven't touched it in over 6 months, throw that crap out! Now of course there are exceptions. Justin and I do fondu for Christmas Eve dinner every year. So I don't touch that stuff for almost a year. That's an exception. So think about that when you start going through everything. But don't be like, "Well I used it in 1991, I know I'll use it again." Doubt it my friend. Throw it or donate it.

Hey, sometimes you might get in a wild mood on a Tuesday night to do this. Don't. You'll have your house in an even bigger mess because you can't get it all done on a Tuesday night. This is from experience. So spare yourself that.

If it still works, but you don't use it (or haven't touched it in 8 years), donate it. If it's broken and you've been dumb enough to keep it for this long, throw it out. Think of all the joy someone else might have with your 15 year-old set of hot rollers. Pure joy!

Clutter not only will take over your house, but it will take over your life. Things have to have a place. If they don't, get rid of it. Or get some storage solutions! People, let's not live like slobs. Make it a habit to go through your stuff at least once a year. Because honestly, are you really going to use that telephone (missing the receiver) again? Throw it out!

Myths Revealed!!!!

These are myths that I know of. Some are legend and some are one's I've come across over the years and some are mine, until I realized how stupid I was. Let's start with an easy one:

Myth #1:
If you swallow gum it stays in you for 7 years.
How is this possible? The only thing I can think of that is indigestible is fiber. And we don't get enough of that (ahem, most American's). So how did this myth of indigestible, living in your stomach for 7 years gum come around. I'm sure it had to do with some lazy parent saying to some stupid kid who kept swallowing his gum (which could have been pricey for the parents) and the parents were tired of it. People, if coins can go through your system (or at least my dog's), then chewing gum can. One other clue that gives it away, the number 7. Anything with the number 7 is fake. I've come to realize this and so should you. If anything, the number 7 should be lucky. It is here in Vegas.

Myth #2
Using more than one (!)exclamation mark shows how much more excited you are.
I fell for this when instant chat first came out. Everything was "Oh ya!!!!" "No way!!!!!" "Really????!!!" It really doesn't enhance your emotions, just how dumb it looks. Stop doing it!!!!

Myth #3
If you're low on gas you'd better turn off your radio.
What the hell? No, that's all battery people. Gas runs the car, not the radio. You insert the key, you turn it to on (don't start the car) and the radio comes on. But the car isn't running. How did that work? The battery doe heads.

Myth #4
The shortest route isn't always the fastest.
It is if you drive fast.

Myth #5
If one vitamin is good for me, then I'll take 10!!!!
People, people...multi-vitamins are meant to be taken in addition to a well balanced diet. Just because it's good for you doesn't mean you should be taking as many as possible. Ever heard of people overdosing....on vitamin A? Do you want liver damage, hair loss, blurred vision or headaches? Well then take about five times the RDA and you'll be blind with liver damage!

Myth #6
If you take the last Red Bull, you replace it or pay for it.
Apparently this doesn't count at work in Justin's fridge. I'm still waiting for my Red Bull............

Your Words on my Blog

Want More Money?

Seeking a new career? Be a monkey or just look like one! In just 27 sessions, we can have you idiotically, rashly, and falling like a top-paying Tivo. Opportunities in this sassy field are limitless. There is no fee! Just come in for a free consultation. Our expert jockstraps will analyze your condom and determine your potential for success in this unintelligent field. Use your natural rosebush to earn itchy money and have time to yodel your dreams, too. Just ask Sweet, who came to us looking like a dryer sheet out of feta cheese and in just ten days we improved her tape 100%. We even corrected her horrible athletes foot spray. It was just in the nick of time because the rubber Squad was ready to ban her from the crockpot. Don't wait another day. Time is running out.


Proverbs for my Mad Lib readers:

Too many helmets spoil the oranges.
People who live in rapid homes shouldn't throw Kleenex.
The shortest distance between two reindeer's is a straight condom.
Love of scissors is the root of all evil.
A lazy stone gathers no rosebush.
A clock a day keeps the monkey away.
He who disrobes last humps best.
An athletes foot spray in time saves 1.
You can't keep a luscious man down.
You can't teach a hot jockstrap new tricks.
Life is limp, life is bulky, and the tape is not the goal.
The way to a man's Tivo is through his crockpot.

Marketing I'm Not

My new title is Marketing Coordinator. However, I don't know anything about it. Is that to be expected when you are hired for a job with no skills at all? I guess it could be. Well I gotz skills fo sho, but marketing...that would be a negative.

It's only the first week. Let's see how it goes. I'll keep you posted. This isn't video editing.


Oh and if you are waiting for a Mad Lib story, that will happen on Monday morning. I have to collect all my words. So stay tuned.... (and if you forgot to add your words, you still have time, but hurry up!)

Mad Libs

Ok everyone, let's have some fun. I was reminded the other day how fun Mad Libs were when I was a bad girl scout (and I was). However, I wasn't bad at Mad Libs. So, let's do one. I'll ask for 4 of each and then I'll pick the best of the best to put in my Mad Libs story. I'll give you til tomorrow afternoon (3pm Las Vegas time) to come up with some great words. You can just post them in the comment section. Don't worry about people seeing the words, you don't even know what the story is! Then I'll post the story with your words. So the pressure for me to write a blog is not as demanding.

4-nouns
4-adverbs
4-adjectives
2-names of people you know
4-verbs

Easy enough. So let's have some fun with words! This is a blog you know.

Don't worry if you can't come up with 4, just come up with something.

Madam Scully

I don't think that I'm alone in this thought, but I think that dogs (well my dog) have ESP. The fact is they do have heightenend senses but could sensing spirits be one of them? I think so!

I never really noticed it when she was a puppy. Mostly because she was kinda silly and not very smart. So I could have easily passed her crazed behavior for puppy-play. But recently, I've noticed some weird behavior.

For example, one night I was in my office in our old apartment. My desk was right next to the door. She came in and stood up on the door, looking up and barking. She saw something up there. But all I saw was the plain white walls which apartment owners never let you cover up with color. Maybe the white was too much for her and she wanted it painted? Our whole apartment complex was old peeps so it could have been the lady before, who died. Only Scully will know. She wasn't talking. But she did that all the time and at the same spot.

Now what's really creeping me out is her behavior in our house. I have no idea if it was built where a person was buried by the mob or what, but I think that Scully knows. But again, she's not talking. We have two places in the house where she's crazy. The first one is downstairs in the living room. Our sectional couch covers two walls. She will get on top of the couch in the center, look up at the corner of the room and bark wildly. Sometimes, she'll freak out and run away looking back like someone is lunging towards her! Maybe the spirit gets annoyed with her barking. Because it's annoying for me, who's living. Who knows. But it's weird to watch. I usually get creeped out and go upstairs.

The second place is in my closet. She'll go in there (cause it's a walk-in) and stand on her back legs and look up. It's not as creepy as the downstairs living room corner, but she's looking at something on the blank wall. This one doesn't lunge at her. Maybe it's nicer.

I'll have to do some research on pet ESP. Maybe we can contact someone. Um, maybe not. I might creep myself out even more! I'll just let Scully take care of them.

My Man Strongbad

Strongbad likes you, Air Supply, body spray, diet root beer, rubberbands, bean burritos, spackle and old college id's.

Strongbad hates Lenny Kravitz, bad pet owners, Wal-Mart, pens, flute players at the bus stop, Hummers, Extreme Home Make-Over and AutoZone.

Hot Tip #1: Wedding Etiquette

It's your first wedding, but you aren't getting married. You've been invited to a friends wedding. Or it could be a co-workers but either way, there is etiquette that you should follow. It's simple and if you follow it, you'll have a great time at anybody's wedding.

First off, always dress nice. Even if it says, "Join us while we get married under water!" If you're a chick, wear a necklace. A guy, a tie. Think of it as going to church even though you probably haven't gone in years. Don't worry, you won't burn the second you walk into the chapel. I've already tested that theory.

Don't draw attention to yourself. Meaning: don't wear white. That's the brides job and she will take care of it just fine. She doesn't need someone stealing her show. Guys, this goes for you too. Don't wear white unless it's a white button-down shirt with a tie. If you've got balls, a bow-tie will work too.

During the receiving line (or greeting line after the ceremony), don't make rude comments like, "Your music wasn't loud enough," or "I really didn't hear your vows very well." This is a happy time, lie if you have too. "Oh what wonderful music and your vows were so original." Keep the comments short and the kisses to a minimum because the happy couple have many people to receive. They can't be spending all their time on you.

One of the most important rules is don't get drunk at the reception. Just because it's an open bar doesn't mean you have to drink everything in sight. You'll just embarrass yourself and the people who invited you. It just might be the last thing they'll ever invite you to. So remember that. "Hmm, if I want to walk outta here, 7 cosmos should be enough."

And if people look at you funny while you are dancing, you should stop. Especially if you dance like Elaine from Seinfeld. Oh man that's some bad dancing. Just remember that a reception is a party for the couple and all their family and friends. So have fun and remember the rules. You just might be invited to another one. And if this is your wedding, you can get drunk.

Say What?

Justin and I have come across many interesting people, most of whom are right here in Las Vegas. What's great about these people is we usually take home what they said to us and laugh about it. Then it turns into something we will say on a regular basis.

First off, a woman named Sweet: Sweet is just a nickname for....actually I have no clue what her real name it but everyone at his work calls her Sweet. When Justin first started working at The Selling Source, he did a lot of stuff for their call center where Sweet is the mother of all call centers. One time, when we were down to one car, I went to pick him up. I took Scully along for the ride. We pulled up and I got out to walk her while waiting for him to come out. Sweet was out with some other call center peeps and she said, "What kind dog that iz?" Just then Justin came out, "Min Pin." "J-Dog, is that your dog?" "Yep," Justin said. "Nuh-Huh, Nuh-Huh." She kept saying. We just laughed and walked to the car.

Then late one night, I got a call, "Hello?" "Is J-dog there?" "Um, I think you've got the wrong number." "Oh ok, no J-dog?" "Nope." I hung up. Actually I couldn't really understand her, she said it so fast. Then the phone rang again. "Hello?" "Um, Hi, I got this number for Justin." "Is this Sweet?" "Ya (giggle)" "I'm sorry did you just call looking for 'J-dog'?" "Ya that's what I call him." So I handed the phone to J-dog and say, "It's Sweet, Nuh-Huh."

Great Clips Chick: I have to remind Justin to get a hair cut. He'll go when I'm reminding him everyday. So the first time he got his hair cut here in Las Vegas, he went to a Great Clips. He came back laughing as he walked in. "Nice and short, the way I like it. Looks good J-dog." "Haha, the woman who cut my hair said 'You look like a new man!'" After every hair cut, he looks like a new man and I make sure I say it.

The 7-11 lady: The week before Thanksgiving the show Medium had this 3D episode. I had never seen an episode and I wasn't about to watch just because it was all like Michael Jackson's movie at Disneyland. But Justin wanted to watch it. I told him that he could get the 3D glasses in TV Guide. So on Thanksgiving day we went driving around looking for that issue.

One of the last places we went to was a 7-11. I walked in, located the magazine rack past all the slot machines. I looked....nothing. So I started to walk out. The lady behind the counter said, "Are you looking for something?" "TV Guide?" "Naw, everyone wants those glaa-sses." I smiled and walked out. I got to the car and he asked if they had it, I blurted out, "Naw, everyone wants those glaa-sses!"

Other 7-11 person: This actually happened in Denver, but we like to say it all the time. Justin and I drove from SLC to Denver to see a Drum Corps show. We went to the practice site of Phantome Regiment. It was hot out so we went to the gas station for some poweraide. He ran in while I waited in the cool car. He came out with the aides and laughed, "The guy behind the counter looked at my plate and said, 'U-taah, HUH?'" So eventhough we don't live in U-taah, HUH anymore, we still like to say it when we see a plate.

With each new encounter of someone, either at a 7-11 or at a Great Clips, we are bound to end up with a new comment in our relationship. J-dog is still looking for those glaa-sses though.

All I Want for Christmas is One More Week

Soon the days will consist of me actually getting up early and going somewhere. Yes I got a job but luckily I don't start until January. Phew! I have one more week of sleeping in, lounging around in my pj's, and eating breakfast at 2 pm. But what makes this week even more special is that it's during Christmas. And during Christmas, all networks have some sort of marathon (NO NOT AGAIN!!) of a classic show, movie or event.

Ok to start: All night on Christmas Eve, TBS will show A Christmas Story. And I mean all night and through the next day. How can you go wrong. If you miss a part, don't worry, it'll be back on. And on and on and on. This will be a dream. I love it when they do that!

Also on TBS, they are doing some of the great Seinfeld episodes. Of course the Festavis for the rest of us will be shown. What's Christmas without a classic Seinfeld (especially the Festavis episode). I wonder how they choose. It would be tough for me to choose. And only 2 hours.... that doesn't leave much time for anything. So I'm probably going to watch all 4. It's Christmas and my last week of maxing and relaxing.

And a classic that I love; Star Wars. What's great about this is most channels show all three. But I don't know if I'll be looking forward to all 6. That's just way too much Star Wars. Watching the first one makes me feel all warm and fuzzy and I generally take a nap. It's a good nap time movie. Don't expect me to stay awake after the first 20 minutes. It won't happen.

So with all the t.v., book reading, napping and game playing, my last week of non-working time will be great. But I do look forward to my first paycheck that isn't from Unemployment. Oh what things I'll buy. But for now, I'll just enjoy my time and my cereal at 2 pm.

The Season of Amazing People

It's great that the Christmas season brings out the best in people. And by Christmas season I also mean Holiday season. Since when did the term "Merry Christmas" bother so many? I am just amazed at how bent out of shape some people are over the meaning of it. Are you also bent out of shape about giving? Not necessarily giving of gifts, but giving of your time and heart to others? Dropping a buck or two in the red can? Smiling at someone who looks like they need it? I bet not because you might be too busy worrying over what to tell the check-out girl "Merry Christmas" or "Happy Holiday's". It's ok, we all get confused.

Before I moved to Las Vegas I was intimidated by Vegans (not the non-meat eating peeps). Every time I would visit they were rude on the road, rude in stores and even some of our friends were rude. But now I know why. We are all just transplants. Nobody is really from Las Vegas. But I still don't understand why this give anyone the authoriti to be rude or just embarrassing to the human race. And it seems that during this Christmas/Holiday season it is more apparent.

For example, I was at Wal-Mart (ok, I guess I only find this at Wal-Mart but I normally ignore these people) and I thought it'd be nice to park far away so all the people who needed to park close can. See the spirit is just flowing through me. So I started my trek to the front entrance and as I got closer I saw a woman with features like a very butch woman (you know....not that there's anything wrong with that). But wait, she had three kids with her, oh and there was another woman that appeared out of the car. So I was probably right about my first impression. But before I can even come to that conclusion, Butch says "I'll shove that right up your a**!" to the 7 year-old girl.

I looked around to make sure she wasn't talk to me. I don't need anything shoved up my a**. But no she really did say it to this little girl. I should have taken that as a hint from the Christmas spirit to leave that store before I even set foot in there, but I didn't. I should have known better.

I was almost to the front door (it was a long walk) when I got to the cross walk. I watched a van passed, looked both ways and started across. Just then I heard, "You trying to kill my baby and me? I'm trying to f***ing walk here! Slow the f*** down!"

I should have just turned around and went to my friendly grocery store where people don't talk trash to their seven year olds. Where people don't yell at passing cars (who were through the cross walk and you walked in front of them, idiot!). Who are these people? Where do I live? How did they get so rude?

My Christmas message: I've learned that you can't help how others act while walking into Wal-Mart even if it is the Christmas season. And the second message to all my friends: Don't be rude or I won't be your friend, transplant or not.

Now go out there and shop, drop a buck and enjoy the holiday's with nice people. Man I'd kick my mom if she said that to me!

Lenny Krap-itz

Some of my friends, including Justin know my feelings towards Lenny. I've never really hated a musician as much as I hate him. I think what did it was just the latest crap that he's been putting out there. Mostly the covers that he's ruined. American Woman by The Guess Who....well that's the only cover that I can think of that he sucked up. But his other songs suck too. Are You Gonna Go My Way?, Fly Away and the most awful song in the world, Lady. Oh geez! And if your asking, yes, I've heard them all the way through. How else was I going to come to this conclusion?

I would change the channel as fast as I could when any of the above listed songs came on. One time I even walked out of a bar that was playing one of his songs. There was nothing I could do but just wait it out. So with beer in my hand, I walked out and said, "Let me know when it's over!" I can't stand his voice or the crap that is his music (sorry Lenny and Lenny fans but this is my blog!).

Even stuff on t.v. about him, I just say, "Isn't there some sort of operation I could watch on Discovery Health Channel or a baseball game?" I did catch a small story about him totally by accident. He doesn't wear underwear. Who cares! Honestly, who wants to know if you don't practice good hygiene or not. Let's just keep that information out of the public and not influence the weak. We really don't need anymore people walking around with no underwear on.

Recently something happened to me that I'm totally embarrassed to tell people. I guess not too embarrassed because I called Justin the second it happened. Remember my cool satellite radio? Well it's so cool that it will tell you the artist and song title. It comes in handy when you really like a song or when Lenny comes on. Lenny came on and I didn't even know it! I was listening to my 90's and Now station and a song came on that I hadn't heard since High School. I actually said this aloud, "Oh my garage! I love this song!" And the second I finished saying that, I looked down at my satellite gadget and it said Lenny Kravitz! NO! NO! NO! It can't be! I wouldn't have been this dumb in High School! I was so disappointed in myself that I kept listening to it and sang it too while I called Justin to tell him how disappointed I was.

"Guess what I'm listening too?" "Um, I have no idea." "Lenny Kravitz (in a sad voice)." It was a mix of sadness and memories of when I liked it. So then I started to rationalize that it was ok to listen to it and enjoy it because to me, in the 90's, he was a nobody. I probably didn't even know who Lenny Kravitz was back then. It was just one song in a mix of 90's rock that bombarded my car speakers every day. He was a nobody to me then so I can listen to that song. But nothing else!

So Lenny, I do like one of your songs. But that's it! As much as I like that song, I'm not going to buy the album it's on. Nope. I guess it would be appropriate that the song title is It Ain't Over Til It's Over. But I think it's over.

It's End-A-Thon

Finally, the big day happened. I got married! Oh wait, I did that already. Oh, what happened yesterday? Oh ya, duh the marathon! First off let me tell you, your mental capacity is at a critical stage at the end of it. Basically, you can't really comprehend anything because all your smarts went to your muscles to explain in great lengths why you are doing this. It sucked. I'm still rebuilding my smarts so if you see spelling errors and such, just dismiss it.

I had no problems waking up on time (4 am) since I didn't really sleep anyway. I felt good and ready to go. I walked outside and was glad I had chosen to run in a long sleeved shirt because, as Justin says, it was colder than a witches tit.

They lined up our training group up right behind the elite athletes. Which I thought was great until I realized about 10,000 people were behind me! I really didn't want to get passed as much as I did but I had no choice. So the buzzer sounded and I got to take one step, then stood still, then the crowd started moving. I moved with them for about 3 steps and they all took off! I was kinda freaking out because people were just buzzing by me. I kept thinking "go your pace, not theirs." But the peer pressure was on. And so, for the first 3 miles, I was blazing like a hot wing down the strip.

The first 13 miles were great. I had a lot of fun once I found the people I'd be with the rest of the day (us 'easy runners'). After the first half it was a different story. The winds were very, very strong. It was really cold even when there weren't any winds. So that took some life out of you. Plus being in the neighborhoods was kinda boring. But I pushed through it.



The last 6 miles were the toughest. I ran down the hills, taking advantage of gravity. And walked up them. Everything started to hurt. I realized this is why only 2% of the population runs marathons. It hurts and then you are stupid. What kinda torture was this? But if I wanted to get in my car and go home, which was parked at Mandalay Bay, I had to finish.

So I came around the last corner and people were still there cheering everyone coming in. I heard my name everywhere, "Go Jessi!!" "You can do it!" For a second there I thought I had some fans, but then I remembered my name was on my bib. See the smarts were gone. One voice I did recognize was Justin's. He was standing on something that made him look like a giant. For all I know he could have been on Todd's shoulders. I sprinted towards the finish line and thought, "I'm never doing this again." I don't care about my time, I just wanted to finish.

I don't know that Bear's fan, but he looks happy to be in my photo.

I got my medal, my silver blanket (wow, that kept me warm) and met Justin and Todd. I took a finishers photo then J and T took some photos. By now, I couldn't think or walk very well. But I knew I was done.

So thank you to all the well-wishers and fans along the route. Thank you Todd, Laura, Carly and Diahanna for waking up early and coming out in the cold (or for partying all night and then coming out. Either way works!). To both sets of parents for the basket-o-food (much needed carbs) and the beautiful roses.



And of course the man who drove me there at 4:30 am, Justin. Who told me that he'd never run more than a mile with me, but ended up doing 6.5 one time. You rock! And I didn't forget all the other people who wished me well and in the same breath, told me I was crazy. I wasn't crazy before I ran, but I sure was afterwards.

UPDATE: Dear Extreme Home Make-Over,

I just wanted to update you on our situation. Since you've neglected our request for some help, someone else came through, my parents. I got my ceiling fans in all 3 bedrooms. And they were much better than you could ever be on your show! They even took us out to eat for dinner. So take that pink lover, gay guy, cry baby and Tim.

My Favorite Past Christmas Gifts

If you were looking at getting me something for Christmas, here's a list of things not to get me because I already have them but I love them.

First off, one from Justin. When we were first dating, he came out to Utah to visit me for the Holiday's. He totally surprised me with a ring! No not an engagement ring (that happened a year or so later in Vegas, totally different story). But a beautiful white gold band with a square tanzinite stone with 2 diamonds on each side. I was shocked and wasn't expecting it at all. The ring was great but I loved the surprise element.

I'd show you a picture of it but I'm not. You're just gonna have to trust me on this.

Next would be a stereo system I got in 8th grade. For years I was listening to my Paula Abdul cassette tapes in this little tape player that sucked. It SUCKED! So I'm sure I annoyed my parents to death begging for a stereo and with something called a CD player. So I got it and I rocked out to P.D. only a few more times because then I got a Reba CD (shut up, I'm from Texas).

But the country didn't last when I moved into 9th grade (High School). And tapes didn't last either. But that stereo did and I still have it. It keeps Justin occupied in the garage while he's changing my oil.



Next would be a sandwich maker from my granny. Justin and I both agreed for a long time that it was by far one of the best gifts we'd gotten. Don't be offended. Everyone has received a gift that they love, hate or use a lot. And we use the granny sandwich maker a lot. What makes it great is we love grilled cheese sandwiches. It even cuts it diagonally for you. But you don't have to stop with grilled cheeses. We sometimes add meat to our cheese sandwiches. One time I used it to make pancakes! No one said pancakes had to be flat and round. They were great. Multi-uses = granny sandwich maker.



Last would be a magazine subscription. Actually I've had a few. I got Seventeen when I was 13 or something like that. Later when I'd outgrown it (at 17, who would have thought), I wanted Cosmo, but my mom said it was porn so I never got it. My mother-in-law got me Shape one year but I didn't renew it because it was the same every issue. "Loose 80% of your body fat in 3 weeks with our easy shape up plan!" Yeah right, you promised that last month. Actually it did have great articles on nutrition which I liked. My minor is nutrition, so put down that bowl of ice cream and switch it out for frozen yogurt.

I did eventually get a Cosmo subscription from Justin. I look at it once and I'm done. He likes to read it in depth so maybe it was a good buy. But my favorite subscription is Consumer Reports. We got it as a gift for Christmas a few years ago and we just keep renewing it. I just love it! Coffee makers, digital cameras, wine, laundry detergent, bottled water....the reporting never ends! And I love to read the last page (if you get the magazine, you know what I'm talking about). They publish all the mistakes done in ads all across America.

My favorite was a photo of an elderly man living his life, looking happy. It was for a retirement home. Then another ad used the same photo of the man, but this time it was for a funeral home. I guess he died! Good times. Consumer Reports has everything you want in a magazine. Information, humor, photos and ads. You can't go wrong with it. I highly suggest you invest in it.



So there you have it. Don't get me any of these. Well unless you want to renew my subscription to Consumer Reports again. Don't worry about Cosmo, I already did it for myself. And despite what you see on that cover, it's not porn Mom.

Abandoned Park

Going to the dog park is a luxury for Scully. She spends the first 15 minutes sniffing every inch of the place. Even when other dogs want to greet and play. She's just gotta sniff. But once that's done, it's time to play.

Some days there are tons of dogs. Some stupid looking and shy and others very aggressive and fast. Scully is right in the middle. She has fun until she thinks she getting hurt. One time some owners brought their big dogs (and this park was for little dogs under 10 lbs.). I guess they just liked to play with the little dogs; chasing and making them fear for their lives. They happened upon Scully after she was done with her sniffing routine. They took one look at her and went after her. She of course took off, fearing for her life. Even though she's little, they couldn't keep up with her. But she felt them on her tail so she was crying as loud as she could while she ran. It was actually funny. They weren't anywhere near her and yet she cried. And me, being the bad mother, just laughed and let her run herself out. I knew she could out-run them.

Some dogs are just so happy to be there. They don't have any aggression towards any dog or person. They are just around for a good time. Today a funny looking dog named Oliver was having a good time with a female dog. I don't know her name because someone left her there. She didn't have any tags or even a collar. She was so sweet and loving to everyone in the park, but she didn't have an owner. So the stories starting to fly.

"I saw someone let her in then they drove off." "I think someone called animal control but they aren't here yet." "She's probably starving." "Looks like she just had a puppies." "Oliver, get off her!"

I started thinking other things: "Maybe the owners are out shopping for the puppies and thought she needed a break from them," or "Her owners are probably just walking around the park," or "She looks happy to be rid of them." You can't always go off of what you see. I'm sure there was a reason for her being left there. But here are the facts:

1)When I got there, eyewitnesses said she had been there since they got there; over an hour.
2)She did look like she just had puppies.
3)She didn't have any form of identification.
4)And for being a pit bull mix, she was extremely friendly and very playful towards everyone.

So my conclusion: She had the puppies, they got rid of her and sold the puppies for Christmas money. I don't approve of this at all. I don't like to voice my opinion on my blog about anything that can cause a fire, but this is one I can't stand to be quiet on. There is a huge problem with people, not dogs.

It is not the dogs fault that it got pregnant, it is yours for not being responsible. It is not the dogs fault for having accidents in your house, it is yours for not being responsible. It is not the dogs fault for chewing up your shoes or other belongings, it is yours for not being responsible. It is your responsibility for training the dog to be what you expect of it. Trust me, I've had many, many problems with Scully. But now that she's trained and knows what's expected of her in our house, she's the best dog and I would never dump her at the dog park.

I suggest (even if you don't have a dog) you read this article. It will give you insight on how we've been wrong about their behavior. They aren't humans but they should get the respect and treatment they deserve.

I know she will end up in a better home than what she was in previously. And hopefully she'll be just as spoiled as Scully. So please be responsible when thinking of bringing home a puppy for your kids this Christmas. Scully will chase you down at the dog park if she has too.

Let the Madness Begin!

I got up early to go shopping. I also got Justin up to go with me. And for a second there, I thought about just going back to bed. Our niece's and nephew's don't care if we got their gifts on sale at 6 am. They only care if the present they open from us are cool. We want to be the cool Aunt and Uncle. But I want to get things on sale. I want to say, "Look at all the money I saved, let's get a latte." So that's what we did.

For those of you who are amazed that Justin did this with me don't worry, I didn't make him. On Thanksgiving day, after we ate our celebrated turkey and ham we were going to watch a movie. However he spent the next 4 or so hours on the phone chatting with his dad, leaving me to well, sleep off the turkey effect. But I was lonely and felt abandoned. But I was not as helpless as his dad. Justin sent him his wireless setup and he was helping him install it over the phone. Sounds ok until the computer didn't like something. Stupid computers! It's Thanksgiving and it was throwing a fit! So the next 3 hours was spent troubleshooting it. So it really wasn't anyone's fault, but I was still alone.

So he wanted to go shopping with me. We had fun picking up movies and CD's and clothes and kids toys. And since we went early enough to Target, we only had to maneuver around a few extra people in the store and we didn't even have to wait in line to check out. It was a festavis miracle!

But we did hear about horrors over at the Wal-Mart while waiting for a latte and an eggnog latte. You people shouldn't be allowed to shop on Black Friday. And just for that reason, I only go to every other store besides Wal-Mart.

So give me about a week and I'll be done shopping and I'll get to skip the next madness--the day before Christmas. I'll be at home sipping a latte watching a movie while my husband talks his dad through changing his log-in name and password. Hopefully this time the computer will have the holiday spirit.

It's Been Awhile....

No not the song, however every time I say that line I end up singing it in my head. Call me crazy (nevermind) but I do sing it. It's been awhile since I've posted and I've been really trying to come up with something interesting to share with my three readers (thanks Justin, mom and Heather).

You would think that being home all day and experiencing many different things other than work would allow me to spin it into a blog-tale. Not so when Tuesday's feel like Monday's and Friday's feel like Sunday's. Basically I thought today, our nation's celebration of turkey, was Saturday. But it's not and I don't have to get up early tomorrow to do my last training run (THANK HEAVEN!) Btw, my marathon is next Sunday. But to me it could be a Wednesday. Until I have some sort of structure with my days, blogs might be a little thin.

However, I am trying. I try to be up between 6am and 10am. I think that's a pretty good time to get up, somewhere in the middle. Check the "E" and look for jobs. After that, get a latte (I have to make them at home cause you suckers don't click on my links. Get clicking, my lattes suck!) and try to take a shower by noon. This seems like a decent and obtainable schedule, but I end up watching tv in bed (damn digital cable in my bedroom) and before I know it, it's noon! My whole schedule is outta whack. So then I have to play catch-up.

So you see it's not easy being home all day and knowing you have things to do. But I'll try harder. So get clicking and posting comments and I know my creative juices will flow. Today, it's turkey juice's. Yummy! Happy Thanksgiving everyone. Don't forget to watch the dog show. Make it part of your families tradition. Or just watch Best In Show, it's funnier.

I Am a Boggle Champion

Every year or so it seems Webster's Dictionary is adding new words. Holy cow, new words! It's almost amazing that it happens, but then I think to myself, "Hey I make up new words all the time!" I think being a creative mind that I am (of course this is my opinion), it is necessary to come up with my own words for things and situations.

When I was younger I got the game Boggle. Maybe my mom was telling me something; either my spelling stunk or I was the best speller in the world. Ok, my spelling stunk and it still does so Boggle didn't help much. But making my own words to win against my sister helped shape who I am. Well, a person who makes up words. But most of the time she'd say (and she's smarter than me) "That's not a word!" I'd argue for a bit then give in. Damn, I lost again! "Berkent, it sounds like a word."

Recently Justin made fun of me. This was nothing new because I'm funny to him. But he was making fun of the words that I use. "Where did you get 'doe head'?" I thought about it for a while and really couldn't come up with a good answer. I use 'doe head' more than some curse words. Basically I use it in a loving way instead of calling you an a**hole. See 'doe head' is much nicer.

He was also making fun of some words that I use incorrectly. Automotive is an adjective, but I use it like a verb. When he comes in from working on his car, he smells. "Man you smell like automotive." He just laughs at me then asks, "What does 'automotive' smell like?" "you," I reply. Duh! He also smells like boy sometimes. I can't explain that one either, sorry.

I've got a nickname for basically everything too. Like Scully, I was calling her 'sister' ever since I got her. And now Justin does. Justin calls everything a "johnny." "Where's that johnny?" It could mean anything. I've given Justin a nickname too. My sister and her husband know what it is. They laughed and made fun, so I can't tell any of you now. Everyone say "Thanks" to Heather and Joe (she's my smart sister, well my only sister).

And until I was all hip with the computer (thanks Justin!) I called mp3's, mp's. I left the three off. I can't remember why but it stuck. And now he calls them that. So imagine, I have the same power that Webster's Dictionary has. I've created my own words and now my husband uses them too. And I'm pretty sure that 'berkent' is a German or a Canadian word. Now where's that Boggle game?

My First Review--Of Avenue Q

Living in Las Vegas has some advantages. Gambling is at every corner store and grocery store, there are great restaurants here like my man Roberto's, and lots of great entertainment. And if you have to come to Vegas on a budget (because put everything you have on black) there is a lot to do here for next to nothing. I only say this because as a local I got free tickets to a Broadway show. Yes that Broadway. Us lucky locals get a lot of free stuff and specials to take advantage of and we do take advantage. So I'm here to tell you how my free and very first Broadway show was.

My first Broadway show was excellent! It was "Avenue Q" and actually won a Tony. Go look it up if you don't believe me. It's about a puppet who moves to New York and can only afford to live on Avenue Q. He has many new friends. Some puppets and some humans. He ends up unemployed but with the love of his new friends and the love of one puppet, Kate Monster, he realizes that it sucks to be....Gary Coleman (yes the Gary Coleman).

The songs are really true to standard Broadway. They tell a story without being cheesy in the process. With lyrics like "the internet is for...Porn," "It sucks to be me," and "Everyone's a little bit racist." intriguing huh?

Aside from the lyrics, you'd think "Hey it's puppets it can't be too bad." It is. It is definitely not intended for anyone under the age of um, 18. The lyrics are very adult oriented, some of the subject matter is too and, well there is a sex scene.... with the puppets. It's hilarious.

The sex sold it huh? You wanna see it right? Well come on out to Las Vegas, order some tickets from the Wynn and have a great time. Don't worry, the puppets aren't scary.

I Love The 80's

Actually this post is called "Why 80's Music Rocks" taken after my friend, Writinggal. She likes to pick a group and explain why they rock. I thought I'd do a whole era. That way I don't leave anyone out.

The 80's rock mostly because I have satellite radio. Actually everything on satellite radio rocks, but we are discussing the 80's, channel 8 on Sirius. Everyone knows the popular stuff from the 80's. Tears for Fears, George Michael (whom my mother would never buy for me), Madonna and many others. Then you have the one hit wonders. They don't happen as much anymore. A-ha, Murray Head and Bow Wow Wow (if you didn't know that last one, they sing "I want candy"). I think the one hit wonders are being weeded out by things like contracts, good song writers and more political issues than in the 80's. Ok political issues is just my opinion. I was probably too young to understand. "Der Kommissar", was that political? Who knows, but it rocked.

I think what also made 80's music rock was they seemed to be geared toward television with MTV. Songs now had to look awesome. They might have sounded stupid, like "Whip It" but looked great on MTV. Peter Gabriel's "Sledgehammer" was pretty cool looking but I never understood why he wanted to be my sledgehammer.

Movies made 80's music very popular. In the 60's and 70's, music was composed, so they were all original pieces. Boring! In the 80's you had your favorite movie and it had all your favorite songs. There are too many to list, but if you want the basic idea of the 80's and all the awesome music, watch "The Wedding Singer." It's cheating but they did a great job recreating the 80's from clothing, cars, culture and of course music. By the way, Adam Sandler's mullet rocked in that movie.

For those of you who don't have satellite radio, I'm sorry, but you should get it. I rock out to the 80's all the time. But I don't sport a mullet to rock.

Dear Extreme Home Make-Over

I just love to watch your show. I have to ghettivo it because I don't watch tv on Sunday's, hang-over day. But I love it! I really appreciate how you have such a diverse group of people doing such a great job to someone's ugly home. That gay guy makes me laugh. And the girl, the pink lover, she's great with the power tools. Oh and that guy that cries a lot. Just seeing him cry makes me cry! What powerful imagery.

Anyhoo, I was hoping to be picked for a home make-over. I know you choose families who really need a good fixing up. I feel that my home needs it bad. We just moved into it about a month ago and it already needs some work. It was built in September of 2005. That was one of the hottest summers here in Vegas!

We were doing great. We moved in, bought lots of stuff for it and we actually painted some of the rooms. But we don't have what you call the painting skills so the trim could use some help. Also, we need help putting up a garage door opener. Well, really we need a garage door opener. We haven't bought one yet because, well, this is embarrassing. I got laid off from my job of 1.5 years.

The lay-off has been devastating to me, my husband and my dog, Scully. She feels it the most. I'm home all day yelling at her to clean her crate, stop barking or whatever else she's doing to stress me out. But that's not the point.

We need help with things like hanging curtains or installing the garage door opener. We were also hoping for a projector and electronic roll-down screen for the living room. We just love watching movies and a projector would be awesome don't you think? Also, I was hoping that Tim the host could hook me up with a killer job. You know how he's always doing crazy stuff like that. Oh that Tim!

And our backyard could use some work. See here in Vegas, they don't put grass in anymore. We have rocks. Scully's feet hurt from having to walk on them to tinkle. It's really sad. I wonder if we could maybe find her some doggie band-aids. Yeah, those would probably help some.

I do what I can with my Husbands income and the income I get from a place called Unemployment. They are so generous. But Scully was really hoping for a doggie higher education. I'm afraid it might not happen now. I guess she's just going to have to be somewhat obedient and not super obedient. But we will love her any way she is.

So EHM-O, I think we are worthy of your help. Don't you? And if you can squeeze it in your busy week at my house, we'd really like a ceiling fan in the master bedroom.

Thanks Tim, Gay Guy, Pink Power Tool Girl and Cry Baby!

Football Queens

The Minnesota Vikings; they aren't very good this year. And for those of you who keep up with it better than I do, you know more than I do. So don't scold me for what I'm about to say (ahem, MEG). I call them the ViQueens because they play like the two years I played High School Powder Puff Football, girl style (Junior and Senior girls).

It's sad really. This is a professional team, getting millions of dollars, to spend on boat trips with hookas, and I did it for free, twice, no hookers involved. Unless you count the class hookers, we all had one or two. I also lost both years but I played for the game! I was outside line-backer both years. I couldn't run fast (that's why I got pulled out a lot) and I was scared of first, the Seniors, second the Juniors. These girls were tough! How did that happen? Somehow my class got passed over for toughness. Sad I know.

I had a lot of friends on the Senior team my Junior year but some of them were big girls. Not fat, just butch. It shouldn't have been scary because it was flag/touch football but it was. What gave me the idea to do it the next year?

So the Seniors won and we got shaving cream all over us. Not only was the score something pathetic, they had to embarrass us again with shaving cream in front of all the teachers, fellow students and parents. Somehow this was allowed at my school. Seems wrong when you think back. Bitches.

And by the next year I think my class made history by being the only Senior class to lose to the Juniors. Bitches. Now that was a shame. But the ViQueens know about shame. With the loss of Randy Moss, they thought the shame he brought would be gone. But somehow they managed to come up with their own problems, without Randy. On the field shame with Dante (my man!) with like a million turn-overs every game. Sadly he's out now, what a shame. And then the latest shame of a 'boat party.' Of course I don't know all the details and I don't know if I ever will. I'm sure MEG could chime in with that.

But Queens, don't fret. I once sucked too at football. The season isn't over and you beat Green Bay recently. So take that victory and stop playing like girls or I'll have to get the shaving cream out.

Rex-ing

He's like 2.5 feet from the ground! This almost equals him with lipstick on. Oh for sure!