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Monday, July 03, 2006

6 Moments In My Life

1. While walking through Target, I passed two 7-year-olds with jumbo sized rubber bands in their hands. These are the rubber bands that make you scream if shot at you. They looked like trouble makers and I didn't want any welts on me so I anxiously walked passed them. Giving them the stink-eye just to make sure they weren't thinking about using me as target practice. It worked.

2. I finally watched "Gone With the Wind" and I have to say: Did it really need to be 3 hours and 45 minutes long? Honestly, I could have cleaned my bathroom (which I did when the power went off for 45 minutes) or sewed up a new purse like I was supposed to. Ok, so I sat through 3 hours of it. But still! And the ending...what was that all about? If you haven't seen it, you should. It is a classic. But I don't think I'd recommend it to anyone else.

3. to die for, slender, dazzling vibrant, smashing, knockout, the right stuff, a dash of panache, get ready to shine, with style and grace, in vogue. These are just some of the words in the "Stylish" section of my overly used book "Words That Sell". I'm so not creative, I have to have a book tell me the words I'm looking for. But I don't use them in my blog. I'm not trying to sell you anything...yet. My dream of being a purse maker is up to you. If you'd like to contribute to my fabric fund please send a check to me. Thank you. (Did I succeed at convincing you? No, man this book sucks!)

4. Remember that show "Quantum Leap"? Well I always fear that I'm that dude who's transmitted through time ending up in someone else's body. But my fear is that this body is on the field or in a gym performing a drum corps show or winter guard show. Obviously I wouldn't know the routine or the drill. So I've thought up a great plan. I'd run off as fast as possible faking an injury. Hopefully I wouldn't have a solo. Then I'd be in big trouble with the directors.

5. You know that skunky musk smell that women seem to think smells so good? No not that actual skunk smell (that does smell good) but that hideous, if you can call it perfume, perfume that burns your nose. Every flight I take I fear that someone sitting around me has that on. My biggest fear: The person sitting next to me has it on and I can't switch seats. Oh my garage! I have a flight this Friday and it is my number one concern. Not making the flight on time. Not dying in a plane crash. But sitting next to this musky person for 3+ hours! A close second is sitting next to someone with body odor. Not automotive but B.O. What a nightmare! Seriously, if you wear this and think it smells good, you might want to see an ear, nose and throat doctor because you are all outta whack. Could you make me an appointment too? Your killing my pirates!

6. Since summer is officially here in Las Vegas, bringing us temperatures of 105, I decided to get a pedicure. The 2-month-old polish hanging on for life needed to come off. And since I was too lazy to take it off, a pedicure seemed to be the next best thing. Plus I got to sit in a massage chair.

I don't mind people working on my feet if they do a good job. This dude (yes a dude) did a good job until he nicked my cuticle. But I didn't care because I was in a massage chair. My feet are naturally beautiful with the big red bunions and hairy toes. I don't feel the need for a pedicure all the time. I just want to sit in that chair! I wonder how much they'd charge me to sit in it? It might be cheaper to get the pedicure with it...so I'll just keep getting a pedi. Now my toenails are as red as my bunions.

5 comments:

Writinggal said...

I hear ya, bunion sister. Oh, and I also have a similar dream: that I missed a day of school and when I return my whole 4th grade class is doing this dance and I don't know the steps.

MEG said...

On tour I had a reoccurring dream in which I would run around the field all crazy-like during a performance, knocking people over. I was always a little scared that I would be overcome by something and actually do it.

Jessi said...

WG: good thing it was only 4th grade. They might forget if you really did that.

MEG: Interesting dream. Do you have it at MBI? Or are those beer dreams? hehe

TonyM said...

1. I have a couple of those oversized rubberbands in my desk at work for "special" occasions.
2. I don't think I've ever seen "GWTW" in my life in one sitting. You win!
3. Gurl you are so creative it's scary! No, seriously, I saw your show "Short Ride" and that is creative! You had to make Chance do that show so you win again!
4. I was having dinner at a resturant and on my way past "The Little Door" I stepped on Scott Bakula. He's DREAMY!
5. I hate that smell too, does that make me cool?
6. I wanted a facial over the weekend but the place was booked - SHIT! They did ask if I wanted a pedi but I turned it down.
5. I

Jessi said...

You don't want anyone looking at your fab feet? hehe.